The Obsession

Overheard at the Local Pub:

(On a table for 2)

"Hic! She was the Spring, and smelled of the verdant. She would smile, and my whole world would come to a grinding halt. I could kill for that lovely smile between those little dimples. You know those times, when something gets to your head, and your every action, every thought, every moment of your existence -- all becomes governed by this One Thing. You hypothesize every occurrence as something towards or owing to, this One Thing.

You begin to dream, and dreams become overtly imposing. Each bit of you panders to the enrichment of the experience of this One Thing. The Thing is so divine, so heartening, that if it were food, you would want to have it little by little... like the greedy child who wishes to eat his cake, and have it to.

She unquestionably was this Thing for me. She was like fresh flowers that bloom along the banks of fabled magical rivers emerging from glacial peaks. And she was the bedazzling Sun as it outshone other stars. Stars even bigger than it, brighter than itself. She was the inebriating, consuming, commandeering thought which refused to part ways with me for even one fleeting moment.

In those days there would always be a constant grin on my face, and a happy thought to fall back upon. I worked better. I didn't waste time over inconsequential pursuits. I didn't have time for them. Somehow, I would drown away Her thoughts into massive volumes of work. And it helped. I found myself hurtling towards something which would earn me accolades, accomplishment, friends, a new life... it put me in the grooves to strive for something I knew earlier as beyond me.

It was all good. I was doing what my close ones wanted me to. I was on, what they call, "The Right Track". But then I barely ever spoke with her. I got lost in my stride. I never reverted to that which was The Obsession. And it all gradually sublimed. Thoughts faded out, memories dissolved and time did what it does best -- flowed forward. Hic!"

"Drink up, you're already seven pegs high. Never knew you'd get so philosophical. And forget about Her. She's possibly somewhere out there, happily settled with some nice guy."

"Hic! She's out there, right... and quite possibly well settled and happy. But oblivious of her role in keeping a loyal heart live and kicking for so long. Times change Jim, but The Obsession lives on. Damn I love her. Hic!"

iMallu

Your narrator here, having lost possibly every humanely conceivable mode of killing time, decided to interview this rotund corpulent thing.

Note: certain explicit content to follow. Don't say I didn't warn you. The content below is mostly original. All answers are genuine, and haven't been sexed up.

Me: which city were you born in, which was ur school and which was ur first crush

Mallu: why

Me: shut-the-fuck-up and furnish the info

Mallu: no, pehle batao kyun. Gimme a good reason.

Me: (after a few derogatory & inconsequential remarks) I'm interviewing you, you moron.

Mallu: Kodungallur
Schools 3 of them. The last of these were SN Vidya Bhavan Chentrapini

Chantrappinni

CHentrappinni
phew!
(Yup, even Mallu ain't comfy with mallu lingo yet)

Me: and which was ur first crush.

Mallu: (apparently taking us for a ride) when I was in [std] 2nd or 3rd... I remember the crush. Her name was Lydia. Called her Lydia Chidia. :P
(No wonder it never worked out).

Me: right... that's so cute. And which was your first post-puberty crush?
(Yea, that's when it'll matter anyways)

Mallu: Many.
(And he's still single and going strong)

Me: enlighten us

Mallu: most will read this blog, so leave it.

Me: (after a few derogatory remarks) Talk!

Mallu: Ok, there was this girl, smart, and intelligent than all others. Rukhsana. Intelligence does turn me on. :P
(Apparently he gets turned on by intelligence. Now I understand what this intelligent guy does locked in his room all day.)

Me: Right... right... so which class was this in? I mean, when did you attain puberty...(and fall for this girl)

Mallu: end of class 6th vacations.

Me: f*** you! You were done pubing yourself before class 7th??

(conversation segment ommitted in order to preserve readability)

Mallu: ...that's all to it. It was a silly crush.

Me: Keep going...

Mallu: I spent most of my school days shit scared.
So not much luck there.

Me: Scared? What was so scary?

Mallu: Talking to a girl.
(He was IIT material at school already)

Me: Hmm.. lets move on...

Mallu: Then there was this girl. Called Divya. My friends used to make up stories of us.

Me: (cheaply) can you quickly relate one such story

Mallu: (obviously irked) not much there... she was a nice friend. I haven't had the sexual feelings about her.
(He sounds like he pardoned the mademoiselle by not harbouring feelings for her)

Me: ok

Mallu: Are you happy. I spilled my gut out.

Me: just a few more queries... how would Mallu define a girl. Make it quick.

Mallu: #define girl

Me: ok. That sucked. How would you define a girl in english.

Mallu: LMAO (laughing-my-ass-out)

Mallu: a general girl, or The One?

Me: #define theOne

Mallu: ok. I should be able to come home and discuss the world with her and hope she understands, and discuss with me.

Me: and what kind of discussions will you bring home?

Mallu: anything. I like her to be a nut loose like me. The more the better.

Me: where does Mallu see himself 10 years hence.

Mallu: ten years from now... 31. :)

Me: too succinct. Elaborate.

Mallu: start my day, waking up next to my wife. Send kids to school.
Then work at home checking out how business is running. Call a few team meetings online. Write a blog entry about a product launch...

Me: keep going...

Mallu: have a power lunch with a big-shot, convince that guy to do something.
Come back home in a chauffer-driven-car (no more walking)

Me: which car

Mallu: Don't care. Buy a gift for my kids, or something nice for the wife. Come back home by 4pm. Take them out to park. And enjoy the rest of the night with them.. while the stocks are maturing away in the background.

Me: Nice. What does Mallu do, if locked in overnight with a horny bitch, and a net-connected laptop in a dungeon?
(I intended to know which of the two he would screw)

Mallu: We make a porn stream :)
(He screws both)

Me: right

I have had some interaction with ur younger bro. if I told you that 15 years from now, he'll be buying your firm out, how would you react to such a possibility.

Mallu: thats good, cuz i will take the money and buy a boat and retire

Me: at age 59, is Mallu still the usual geek?

Mallu: my life's geeky. Its me.

Me: right. On a closing note, What would you like to tell Bill Gates and the Google Boys, if you were in a meeting with them?

Mallu: why are these numbers so low for this month?? I dont want it the same way next month! :P

Me: Haha. Anything else you'd like to add, Mallu?

Mallu: yeah, Hansraj is a dumb motherfucker.

Me: Right. Spankyou, Mallu, for your time. All the luck for your endeavours.

Mallu: Anytime.